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Post by Argonaut on Mar 2, 2012 0:29:07 GMT
I am wondering if it is better for me to travel to Dhahran (and report to work) first, and have my spouse join me 30 to 60 days afterwards when things are more "settled"?
I am concerned that my non-working spouse will feel quite isolated and immobile the first month or so, until things are settled and put into place. Also, we have no children who would be coming with us to Dhahran.
Comments on peoples' experiences in this regard are quite welcome - thank you.
- Argonaut
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Post by soverydeb on Mar 2, 2012 10:57:35 GMT
I showed up later than my husband, and I'm glad I did! By that time, he had the house set up, a vehicle purchased, knew the layout of the camp (RT) fairly well, and had made friends. All I did was show up and had instant friends, a decent knowledge of camp life, and he had taken care of most of the paperwork. I did have to get the bloodwork, and ID card taken care of....but really, there wasn't much stress for me, nor isolation.
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Post by GroveWanderer on Mar 2, 2012 18:14:10 GMT
I would have to say that's very much a personal decision. I have known lots of people who came over together as couples and had no particular issues. On the other hand, as soverydeb says, it can work out easier sometimes for the husband to come first and sort out some of the formalities. However, it's sometimes nice to go through those things together as a couple and provide support for each other during the settling-in process.
From what I can tell, Dhahran is probably easier to settle into than RT, there are a lot more people, facilities etc available to help ease the transition.
As a Brit, I did not have a choice in the matter, I was not allowed to bring my wife with me (had to complete the 90-day probation period first) but I remember her saying she was not best pleased to be left behind on her own and would much have preferred it if we could have come over together.
I would say discuss it with your spouse and try to come to a decision that you're both comfortable with.
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Post by vpainter on Mar 2, 2012 21:27:08 GMT
I agree with GroveWanderer, it is an individual decision made by couples. Dhahran does have a large population and there is support here for your arrival time. Our DHA Women's Group has a Welcome function and Community Services used to do an orientation tour. Lots of ladies around prior to summer.
If your wife comes once summer begins, it will be a little harder to connect because a lot of ladies go out of kingdom and the heat keeps them indoors. Arriving earlier with you will have her here when most people are in Kingdom.
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Post by Hadia on Mar 3, 2012 2:52:44 GMT
We arrived during Ramadan. No welcome, no tour, no clue or help in how to get around or get settled. Had it not been for the children to keep me busy, I would have left. On the other hand, my husband can't leave work to run all those settling in errands (don't assume all depts allow that flexibility, no matter what the neighbors say!) and many of our database and records issues were messed up when we got here, so he relied on me to sort things out and deal with the house issues, too. It was a constant doorbell ringing parade of gardeners, electrians, AC guys, carpenters and the like. He couldn't have done that alone. Plus, like I said, we have kids, so I was busy dealing with all of their needs. Also, I would not have wanted to deal with selling the house and cars, settling affairs back home on my own, regardless of whether or not we had children. We needed to go through it together, but every family is different. It gets better in time, regardless of which decision you make, to travel together or work it separately initially.
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Post by Argonaut on Mar 4, 2012 14:45:55 GMT
Hadia, GroveWanderer, vpainter, and soverydeb:
Thank you for sharing your experiences. I also received a few private replies related to this post. I am thinking at this point that it will be good for my spouse and I to arrive together in Dhahran, a day or two before the weekend, so that we can spend some time together shortly after arrival meeting neighbors, exploring the community, etc. If things progress according to plan, it looks like (guessing) we might arrive in Dhahran on or about May 1, 2012.
- Argonaut
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