Indy
Member
Posts: 12
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Post by Indy on Apr 27, 2014 19:22:15 GMT
Thank you Suz for starting this post. I leaned from it and as a Christian American whose husband is applying for a position in Saudi, I would encoue you to not give up hope. It is my prayer we may meet each other over there and go out together with our head scarfs on out of respect for their culture.
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Suz
Member
Posts: 44
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Post by Suz on Apr 29, 2014 20:57:54 GMT
Indy, thank you for your sweet post! I also hope we're able to meet over there. : )
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Post by hijabsforher on Jun 10, 2015 4:39:13 GMT
Thank for sharing that information And I suggest you do as you like and feel comfortable.
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Post by bogiefrommuskogee on Jun 11, 2015 4:53:27 GMT
My wife does not by practice cover her hair and, from my experience and unscientific research, has never had any problems when she wears a ponytail. The few times she has been confronted, she was wearing her hair loosely. Her favorite abaya is a “hoodie” so she can simply put it over her hair easily if required by the HAIA. A couple of American families arrived a few months ago and the wives were taken to Khobar by a Saudi woman and were shopping for abayas. A HAIA came in the store and the confrontation was a bit hard. To settle the issue, they were required to hide out in the shop they were in until the Saudi lady could go buy them some abayas as they did not like any of the abayas from the shop they were in. That is not the norm, however. The EP is more relaxed than Riyadh. There going out uncovered would be ill advised. In the EP, there is more grey area. If you’re a new arrival, I recommend you borrow an abaya from a friend to go shopping for one you like rather than bring one with you. Choices are far better here. If you wear loose fitting clothing on arrival to Dammam, that should be more than sufficient. I also know many women who refuse to wear even the abaya. They wear loose clothing covering the arm to the wrist and leg to the shoe. Personally I believe that if you choose to come here, you should try to abide by local customs. Whatever you do, do not argue with the HAIA.
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Post by detfans on Jun 11, 2015 6:20:23 GMT
We were told in the airport by the inmigration officer that neither my wife nor my teenage daughter needed to cover their hairs. The coworker that was at the airport when we arrived told us the same, expat females are not expected to cover their hairs. The experiences that I heard are similar to what bogie mentioned: women that were told to cover had their hair loose. In housing orientation in Dhahran (we don't live there (and maybe never will, lol) but took the orientation to get familiar with the facilities) we were told the same, but my wife and daugther always carry a scarf with them
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stmayo11
Senior Member
ExPats Community Moderator
Posts: 159
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Post by stmayo11 on Jul 4, 2015 9:00:55 GMT
Most non Muslim women here do not wear a headscarf when off camp. Most do wear the abaya. As has been said before by several others, it's a personal decision. Western, non-Muslim women are not required to do it. The religious police sometimes see it differently, but their opinions tend not to represent the views of most typical local people.
Some women choose to wear the head scarf. Most do not. I know of one western woman who has lived here for over 20 years, and she does not wear the head scarf nor the abaya. She once told me a couple of years ago that she's never encountered any real problems, but many stares and looks of disapproval (although I would not recommend this approach.)
Once a few years ago while at the Mall of Dhahran, we were approached by a religious policeman near the food court. My wife was wearing the abaya and no head scarf. He walked directly toward us and he was accompanied by mall security and a crowd of young local onlookers following behind. (Religious police in the malls sometimes attract a crowd and attention when they are wandering about.) He approached me and made a physical gesture with a head scarf he had in his pocket, mimicking with hand gestures that my wife's hair should be covered. He spoke no English.
I smiled and politely said to him "In sha'...next time." He smiled, said "shukran" and walked about his way. It really was no big deal and the whole encounter lasted about 10 seconds. My wife still does not wear a head scarf while out in public. That's the only personal encounter I've had with the religious police here. Not a big deal at all.
Locals seem to be very accepting of Western expatriate women who do not wear a head scarf. Not wearing an abaya, however, is just asking for trouble, in my opinion.
The choice is completely yours.
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Suz
Member
Posts: 44
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Post by Suz on Jul 7, 2015 0:31:11 GMT
Thank you. Glad to read your feedback and know the choice is ultimately up to the individual to do what is best for herself. I do think I would like to just out of respect for the culture. Not even suggesting that others who do not are being dis-respectful. That's not what I'm say at all or even trying to suggest. Just personally, I kind of a have the "when in Rome do as the Romans" perspective. And while I know most people say they just carry it with them "just in case" It think I'd prefer to wear one, even as a devout Christian, just to avoid any stares, potential encounters, etc. Again, it's just a personal perspective. I know most people (probably 99 %) choose to do otherwise and that's okay, too.
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Post by crazycatlady on Jul 9, 2015 4:56:35 GMT
Suz, as a data point, I've never really noticed anyone staring at my uncovered head when out shopping or out to dinner.
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Suz
Member
Posts: 44
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Post by Suz on Jul 9, 2015 23:57:50 GMT
Yes, I've heard that before. Good to know if I don't want to wear one. But I was more less asking if it would ruffle feathers, cause a problem if someone who was an American Christian decided to do so out of respect for their host country. I seem to get the impression that it's an unspoken rule to not do so. I could be 100 percent wrong though! I often hear of people saying, "just carry in case." But I was more interested to know how it would be perceived by "fellow expats" if someone chose to wear one out of respect. I know it's okay if you choose not to.
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Post by bogiefrommuskogee on Jul 10, 2015 3:11:58 GMT
Don't be concerned about what other expats think. I have been here a few years and, until I read your post, that thought had never entered my mind. Since covering your hair is not against your religion, nobody has any reason to have an opinion with regard to your choice. There are Christian groups that also believe in covering the hair. It is not only Islam. The roots go back much farther. Just do what you are personally comfortable with. Covering your hair will offend noboby. Going al fresco will offend a very very few. The odds of you running into them are very low but not impossible. The odds of anything resulting from that are even lower but still not impossible.
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Suz
Member
Posts: 44
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Post by Suz on Jul 11, 2015 22:09:18 GMT
bogiefrommuskogee, thank you for your feedback! It was very insightful! I really appreciate you taking the time to write and give me input. It's very much appreciated. As it stands now, my husband hasn't had a call for an interview yet. Fingers crossed that it will eventually happen.
Again, thank you!
Suz
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